I’ve spent many years in education, beginning as a math teacher at a prestigious private school. As a military spouse and graduate student, my career saw numerous transitions, taking me in and out of the classroom between 1999 and 2019. While much has changed over two decades, one thing remains the same—the steady decline in students’ social, emotional, language, and academic skills. I witnessed it firsthand as a teacher and continue to see it now as a counselor and behavior analyst. Seasoned educators echo the same concern, reinforcing that this is a widespread issue. As parents, we must recognize that lowering expectations is not the solution. Instead, we need to address the root causes and equip students with the skills they need to succeed.
What do I mean when I say “decline in social, emotional, language, and academic skills of students?” Our children are not demonstrating the same level of skills at the ages they previously did. This terrifying truth caused the Centers for Disease Control to alter the developmental milestones checklist in 2022. For example, the standard set in 2004 stated that children should be saying 50 words at 24 months of age. The new standard is 50 words at 30 months of age. Six months may not seem very long, but in regards to early child development, six months is significant.
There are several possible causes for this decline: exposure to toxins, trauma, and nutritional deficits. Those may contribute in some ways, but I posit that the environmental stressor of constant access to handheld screens is the most plausible explanation.
To support your child’s development, start by reducing their screen time. However, parental screen use also plays a significant role in children’s skill development, a factor we often overlook. Since the first smartphone’s creation in 1992, constant accessibility has reshaped how we interact. Instead of focusing solely on why developmental delays are increasing, the crucial question is: what actions can we take to improve the situation?
The solution to this developmental delay dilemma is to fully accept that we, as the adults, are responsible for teaching the children every skill they need to learn. That means that we must begin walking away from our televisions, ignoring the texts, choosing not to return the emails, and instead spend our time teaching skills to the next generation.
Every challenge a child faces stems from a skill deficit. A meltdown when leaving the playground signals difficulty with smooth transitions. Anxiety about ordering food reflects a lack of confidence in speaking to strangers. Disrespect when upset indicates a struggle with maintaining calm conversations in distress. By recognizing these gaps, we can help children build the skills they need to navigate these situations successfully.
Children learn through exposure, practice, and repetition. But when we’re consumed by our screens, we miss crucial teaching moments. Set aside the phone, shut the laptop, and create real-life opportunities for children to develop the skills they need to thrive.
Dr. Beth Long received her education in Counseling Psychology from Chapman University. She is a Licensed Professional Counselor and Board Certified Behavior Analyst. Beth has worked in six unique clinical environments across the country and currently owns Works of Wonder Therapy in Montgomery. Beth utilizes the knowledge from a variety of different disciplines to give her patients the best care possible. To learn more visit www.worksofwondertherapy.com.
